Whew. It took a minute to admit this, but I think it’s true.
Some of you might know this, and some of you might not. Before you continue reading further, it’s worth knowing that due to my diagnosis of Turner Syndrome (which I received in 2002), I always told that child birth would be extremely difficult (if not impossible) for me. I was pretty much told that my ovaries were non-existent.
I’ve come to accept this as my fate since then. I just accepted that if I ever wanted a child someday, I’d likely have to adopt. Is that the worst thing in the world? Of course not. Hell, I always thought that if I ever had the chance to raise a child (however it happens) I’d at least know there would be one less dick-ish person running around. However, it can be a bummer when you see “everyone else” having children seemingly without issue. You see these cute families on Facebook, or even in your favorite coffee shop while you’re sitting alone.
You start to think, “well why am I the one that has to move a mountain to make this happen?” You might even ask, “is any of this my fault?” It’s not, but you still ask. As you get older, or stay married longer, the question of “when are kids coming?” isn’t just on your mind – it’s on the mind of everyone else too. Or, at least, that’s what it seems like. You have to explain your medical situation just to get others to realize that you’re not even completely comfortable with talking about the subject of kids. Holidays are the worst for this.
So, to the mothers that I can now admit that I am jealous of, I’m going to say this: cherish every freaking moment with that little stinker of a kid you have. Though it might make me a little sad to see your cute family growing, I’d never tell you to stop sharing that happiness with us. Please continue to do that. Please give your babies all of the love in the world. They really are a gift.
If you’re an expectant mother not sure about putting your child up for adoption but considering it, I’ll say this: DO IT. I promise, someone like me will love and care for that little one as though they were their own.
To anyone else struggling like me: you are certainly not alone. Keep up the fight. Anyone who cares that much about being a Mom should be, in my opinion.
To all of us, let’s all be a little nicer when it comes to kids.
